i hate you
meaning i love you
you said you didn’t like people like her. people who are always happy and peppy and bouncy.
like, i know i’m stupid, she’s smart, i’m fat, she’s skinny, she’s pretty, i’m average. shes talented, i’m not.
i’m just so fucking jealous. i’ve always been second best to her.
she used to be one of my best friends.
now we talk maybe once in a while. maybe.
thats why it hurts.
i seriously think i actually love you. like, probably not. but i’ve never liked anyone as much as you. you’re perfect. a good balance to my imperfection.
now i feel worthless, and useless, even more so than before.
i hate you for destroying my self-confidence.
and its selfish and horrible to hope that you guys crash and burn, but i do.
i’m sorry.
maybe then i can comfort you… and you’ll fall into my arms.
maybe then.
[remember, by hate i mean love. i could never hate you. no matter how hard i try.]
